My Mentor and Me

Mentors hold us responsible for meeting deadlines, accomplishing goals and making progress. They are a powerful combination of ‘wise old owl’ and critical friend; they make it easier to achieve your goals – and have some fun along the way.

How My Mentor relationship works:
When you enter into a relationship with a mentor, you agree to hold each accountable. Talking on a regular basis is essential for maintaining momentum and making steady progress toward your goals.

Ideally, you should talk to your mentor every week. During the intervening 7 days you have the time to accomplish your goals for the week and plan your commitments for the next.  Your mentor will note down your goals and ask you about them next time.

Once a month or every other week you should schedule a longer meeting with your mentor so they can provide a deeper level of support and insight.

Use the time with your mentor to get their input on a challenge you are facing; brainstorm ways to achieve a particular goal you’ve set, or tap into your mentor’s network of resources - it’s always the case that two heads are better than one.

When looking for a Mentor, look for someone who:
Is 100% committed to growth; theirs as well as yours.  Mentors are as interested in their own growth as they are in yours.
Keep any agreements you make. Entering into a mentoring relationship requires making a commitment of time and energy - yours as well as theirs.

Always hold yourself accountable. One easy way to sabotage your success is to make excuses for yourself when you don’t keep to your agreements. Your mentor will listen to your justifications with compassion and kindness but don’t be at all surprised whey they don’t buy into them. Your mentor will hang on to your vision of success even when you have let go; and challenge you to do the work necessary to achieve the earlier goals you have set.
One thing is certain, at times you will slip and not keep to your commitments. Your mentor will help keep you focused and support you in finding a good solution.

Questions to ask a potential Mentor:
When you find someone who you would like to mentor you; have an honest conversation about what you want from the relationship. The more candid you are about what you need and what challenges have prevented you from achieving your goals in the past; the better equipped your mentor will be to support you.

A few questions a good Mentor will ask you at the start of your relationship:
What motivates you?
When you have set goals in the past, what worked to keep you focused and moving forward?
When you were met with obstacles, or you weren’t achieving as much success as you wanted - what kept you moving forward?
What do I need to know about you that might present challenges in our relationship?
What do I need to know about you that will support our relationship during difficult times?

Working with a good mentor is similar to climbing a mountain range with a skilled accomplice. They will help you hold on to the vision of the summit when you find yourself in a dark valley. They will encourage you when we you get tired and feel like quitting - and when you reach a new peak they will celebrate your success and help you navigate your way to the next. It may be possible to make the climb alone, but it’s far easier and much more enjoyable with your mentor by your side.

Thanks to Nigel for making me think of this. M-J